Showing posts with label Humanity. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Humanity. Show all posts

Monday 19 May 2014

How should one define success?

Richness, wealth, treasure is there, and you have not claimed it yet – and, it is yours, just for the asking. You need not spread your hands anywhere before anybody. The treasure is hidden within your own heart.
People go on searching everywhere else except in the heart. They can go to the Moon and to Mars; and, that journey seems to be easy. Man seems somehow to be very stubborn about going into his own heart. May be, he is afraid that he may find it there!
Psychologists say that there is a very deep-rooted fear of success in the human mind. It looks absurd when you hear for the first time that man is afraid of success, but when you ponder over it, slowly, it dawns slowly on you that it has some deep relevance.
Man is afraid of success, because if he succeeds, then what? That is the fear: then what? So, in a subtle way he tries to succeed and yet creates such obstacles that he cannot succeed.
On one hand he tries to succeed; on the other hand; he disturbs his own success so the game can go on. Just think of a day when you have succeeded and all that you desired has been attained, all that you always longed for is in your hands. Then what? – that is the fear. Then, what will you do? – because, all doing is searching, all doing is desiring, all doing is possible, because there are goals which we have not attained yet. One is occupied, happily busy.

It’s deep-seated

Just think of it a moment and even in thinking you will start trembling inside: if all is fulfilled, then what? Would you like to succeed to that point? And, when you think about that you will see the point of what psychologists mean when they say there is a deep-rooted fear of success.
And, it does not happen only as far as inner success is concerned; it happens with outer success too. It almost always happens that when a person is at the last rung of succeeding, something goes wrong. And, he thinks something has gone wrong from the outside, no. He does something – he takes a wrong step, he moves in an opposite direction. He blames God and he blames fate and he blames society and others, but if you search deep down you will find that people fail only when they were just going to succeed.
There seems to be that deep fear which, at the last moment, says to them, “What are you doing? Avoid it.” It is very unconscious. They fail, and then they are busy again. That’s how people keep themselves busy; life-in and life-out they keep themselves busy. This is called the wheel, the samsara, in the East; this is the world. That’s why people don’t go into the heart, which is the closest point to go to. They go on great journeys and pilgrimages, but they don’t search within.

It is a condition

Success is a by-product; one need not think about it. And, if you think about it, you will not get it — that is a condition. Don’t think about success, because if you start thinking about success you become divided. Then, you are not totally in the work; your real mind is in the future: “How to succeed?” You have already started dreaming how you will be when you have succeeded, how you will be when you have become a Buddha – what beauties, what benedictions, what blessings will be yours. Your mind has started playing the game of greed, ambition, ego. Never think of success. Success is a natural by-product.
If you work really sincerely upon yourself, success will follow you just as your shadow follows you. Success has not to be the goal. That’s why Lu-tsu says, “Work quietly, silently, untroubled by any idea of success or failure.”
And, remember, if you think too much of success you will constantly be thinking of failure too. They come together, they come in one package. Success and failure cannot be divided from each other. If you think of success, somewhere deep down there will be a fear also. Who knows whether you are going to make it or not? You may fail. Success takes you into the future, gives you a greed game, an ego projection, ambition, and the fear also gives you a shaking, a trembling – you may fail. The possibility of failure makes you waver. And, with this wavering, with this greed, with this ambition, your work will not be quiet. Your work will become a turmoil; you will be working here and looking there. You will be walking on this road and looking somewhere far away in the sky.

Starry slip

I have heard about a Greek astrologer who was studying stars, and one night, a very starry night, he fell into a well. Because, he was watching the stars and moving about – and, he was so concerned with the stars that he forgot where he was – he moved closer and closer to a well and fell into it.
Some woman, an old woman, who used to live nearby, rushed up, hearing the sound. She looked inside the well, brought a rope, and pulled the great astrologer out. The astrologer was very thankful.
He said to the old woman, “You don’t know me but I am the royal astrologer, specially appointed by the king. My fee is very large – only very rich people can afford to enquire about their future. But, you have saved my life. You can come tomorrow to me and I will show you: I will read your hand, I will look into your birth-chart and I will interpret your stars, and your whole future will be plainly clear to you.”
The old woman started laughing. She said, “Forget all about it. You cannot see even one step ahead, that there is a well, how can you predict my future? All bullshit!”
Don’t look ahead too much; otherwise, you will miss the immediate step. Success comes, Lu-tsu says, of its own accord. Leave it to itself. This existence is a very rewarding existence, nothing goes unrewarded.

Peace of Mind: The Truth beyond Success and Failure

It does not matter to a man of awareness whether he is successful or unsuccessful, well-known or absolutely unknown, powerful or just a nobody. To a man of awareness, these dualities don’t matter at all, because awareness is the greatest treasure. When you have it, you don’t want anything else. You don’t want to become the president or prime minister of a country.
Those who pursue power suffer even in success – they live in the eternal fear that they might lose it. At first they suffered because they were not successful; now after being successful, too, they are suffering because of a feeling of insecurity. Moreover, they have no private space; everyone wants to meet with them and there are some who are engaged in the task of “overthrowing” them. The life of a successful man is not a life of peace. But in failure, too, there is no peace. For an aware person, it is all the same. Success comes and goes, and so does failure. He remains untouched and aloof.

Tuesday 13 May 2014

7 Types of Love You Might Experience in Your Life

Types of Love You Might Experience in Your Life
Although many people associate love with a romantic feeling, there are a few types of love you might experience in your life. The classical vision of love includes the unity of two people who fall in love, create a family and have kids. You may have already experienced some feelings similar to love, but you cannot understand without realizing what type of love it was.

1. Unrequited love

Unrequited love is going to be the most challenging one that makes you suffer and feel terrific pain. Many people you love just don’t feel the same about you that is quite heartbreaking. This love makes you stronger and more reasonable. You should learn to control your obsessive and emotional desire to get pure love with the person who doesn’t love you. Try to handle this pain and avoid focusing on this problematic feeling. Just go forward and you will have more chances to find your destiny.

2. Platonic love

This type of love doesn’t require you to feel sexual or romantic attachment to the person you adore. Platonic love can occur between friends. It’s the most common type of love because you work and cooperate with a great number of people every day. You can fall in platonic love with some beautiful and lovely person that inspires your mind, soul, and directs your attention to spiritual things.

3. Self-love

Do you find yourself a wonderful person? If not, then you might have problems with self-esteem and it’s necessary to do something about that fact. First of all, fall in love with yourself and you will have an opportunity to love another person. If you still hesitate, then take a list of paper and write down all positive and negative qualities and traits of your character. You will admit how awesome you are. Don’t be afraid to become a smug egotist. You should realize that you love yourself and deserve to be loved by someone else.

4. Lustful love

You may fall in love with a handsome man you meet every day on the way to work. You feel nothing much but passion and desire to taste those plump lips. You have just created the image for him in your mind and you don’t know any information about him and that is good enough. Do you know at least his name? I think you don’t care.

5. Pure love

You might have seen this love in films. This powerful kind of love makes you adore the person’s heart, body and soul. It’s when two lovely people lose control and feel emotional burst. Those who have experienced true love are considered the happiest people in the world. There is a belief that true love is given only once.

6. Puppy love

Everyone has experienced this love, because it usually occurs when you are a kid. This love is full of innocence. If you treat the person like a little lovely doggie, your love can be called “Puppy Love.”

7. Unattainable love

Have you ever been in love with Johny Depp? I am sure that everyone faced the crisis of this fantastic love. No matter how old is your unattainable love, you continue daydreaming about him. You realize that it’s theoretically and practically impossible to live together with your beloved star, but your rich fantasy can do nothing about your obsessive thoughts. Many actors are so perfect that you really cannot help falling in love with them.
The older you become the more types of love you experience. What kind of love have you ever experienced? What type of love is the strongest?

Friday 7 February 2014

The 20 Things You Need To Stop Doing To Yourself

We are our own greatest enemy. We doubt ourselves, complicate our lives, cloud our minds with unimportant thoughts and negativity, we punish ourselves, hate ourselves and then feel sorry for ourselves because “outside forces” are making our lives a living hell. Life is beautiful — you’re making yours a living hell all on your own. Each of us does things from time to time that make living happily more difficult than it needs to be.
Surely some of us have it difficult because those are the cards that we’re dealt, but most of us — especially those who are better off financially and don’t live on the streets — make our very own lives more difficult for ourselves. But there are things you can do to stop the miserable cycle that you have found yourself in — a cycle that I know all too well. Here’s 20 of them:

1. Stop Running From Your Problems and Procrastinating.

Problems don’t go away on their own. You can either make them go away or live with them. If you know you can’t live with them, then don’t procrastinate because the weight of them on your mind only increases over time. If you have a problem, then accept that you have a problem and face it — deal with it. Life is a long list of problems that must be overcome. The faster and better you overcome them, the better and happier your life will be.

2. Stop Lying To Yourself.

People will lie to you left and right throughout your life; don’t add to the pile of lies. It is one thing for others to be lying to you and an entirely different issue if you’re lying to yourself. You are the only person that you can trust…but if you have a habit of lying to yourself, then you can’t even trust yourself. You have to be able to rely on yourself and on what you believe.
If you know something to be false, then stop convincing yourself that it is or could possibly be true. Improbable is one thing, but impossible is another. Feeding yourself lies or half-truths will lead to the forming of a reality that doesn’t actually exist past the confines of your psyche.

3. Stop Living In The Past.

Yesterday was yesterday — it’s gone and will never again be. Everyone carries emotional baggage with them. Some of us carry the weight of a depressing past while others live in those happy long-gone moments that we consider to have been the best of our lives. You can reminisce if you’d like as long as you don’t forget that your reality exists only in the present.
It can be a dangerous thing to dwell on the past. Nostalgia can overcome us and make us feel that the world we are living in today falls short of the happiness we experienced in the past. Other times we will punish ourselves for mistakes that we have done and dwell in the negativity and bad feelings that we had. Whatever the case, be wary of focusing on past events and do your best to live in the moment.

4. Stop Attempting To Buy Happiness.

I’ve tried; it doesn’t work. You can buy drinks, buy drugs, buy sex, buy trips, buy experiences, buy toys and clothes…none of it will make you happy — at least not past the day that you buy them. I always revert to Paulo Coelho on this matter: happiness must be something attainable by each and every person no matter what his or her circumstance. If the poorest of the poor can be happy, then happiness cannot lie in the material.

5. Stop Relying On Others.

People have their own lives filled with their own headaches, own problems, own mishaps and own successes. Friendship is great, but often doesn’t weather the storm. Be self-reliant. Be independent. We all find ourselves alone at several points throughout our lives. If you find yourself on your lonesome and don’t know how to deal with it because you are used to having constant support, then you will drown.

6. Stop Fearing Failure.

Failure is such a derogatory term… I don’t understand why. Failing is learning in the real world. There is only so much that you can read up about the way the world works, but true knowledge comes from experience. And no one gets it right the first time around. You failed. Great. Try it again. And again. And again. The more times you get it wrong, the more ways you know NOT to do it.

7. Stop Doing The Same Thing Over And Over, Expecting Different Results.

At the same time, don’t keep making the same mistakes and expecting different results. If you tried something one way and it didn’t work, then guess what will happen when you try again exactly in the same manner? Failure is only good if you learn from it. Otherwise it really is just failure.

8. Stop Rejecting Prospective Partners Because Of Your Past Sh*tty Relationships.

You fell in love and had your heart broken; we all have. Luckily for you, now that you have experienced the pain of a broken heart, you have fully experienced the love cycle and can grow as an individual. Relationships, like the rest of life, are learning experiences. Don’t generalize and make yourself believe that all relationships end in heartache because that doesn’t have to be the case. Ultimately, you and your partner decide whether or not the relationship will work. Check your baggage at the door.

9. Stop Feeling Sorry For Yourself.

Life is tough for everyone. The richest of the rich have problems. The poorest of the poor have problems. We make problems for ourselves — they don’t exist outside of us. Stop feeling sorry for yourself and start interacting with the world around you.

10. Stop Trying To Change Others.

People don’t want to be changed and most often can’t be changed. You must learn to accept people for who they are. The less you focus on all the things you find wrong about an individual, the more you can focus on how to deal with them and all their discrepancies. Don’t fix people; learn to deal with them and — I hate to say it — learn to manipulate them into doing what you want them to do; mind-f*ck them.

11. Stop Making Excuses.

I understand that the time isn’t right, the place isn’t right, and the stars have yet to align perfectly. The setting will never be perfect for anything. Perfect is not the alignment of outside forces; it’s making havoc the perfect opportunity. Stop making excuses and start making opportunities for yourself.

12. Stop Worrying.

Sh*t happens. Then it happens again. Then sh*t won’t happen for a day or two…and then it returns with a vengeance. The more responsibilities that you have the more you have to potentially worry about. The key is to not procrastinate and approach all problems logically. You only have so much time in a week to work on the things that need to be worked on. You can do so much with that time. As long as you do as much as you can do, there is nothing you should be worrying about. The only thing worth worrying about is your own laziness; everything else is out of your control. If you worry about things out of your control, then you are setting yourself up for a mental breakdown.

13. Stop Focusing On The Negative.

Negativity is overwhelming and contagious. It tints the way we look at the world and makes us believe that we are worse off than we actually are. Negativity and worry go hand in hand and can be the downfall of all that you have worked so hard for. Living in a world filled with your negative thoughts doesn’t leave any room for the positive. Focus on the negative and you will hate your life.

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14. Stop Being Ungrateful.

Statistically speaking, if you are reading this then most people in the world have it worse off than you do. That may not be very comforting…but consider that most of these people are likely to be happier than you. Happiness does not lie in the material, but in the immaterial. Be grateful for what you do have — especially those that play important parts in your life. You could be worse off and may very well be worse off some time in the future. Enjoy whatever prosperity you have.

15. Stop Wasting Time.

You are only allotted a sliver of time to call your life. Use those minutes and hours to make the most of your life. Ever hear your elders complain about how fast time flies by? Listen. They’re speaking the truth.

16. Stop Overloading Your Schedule.

Doing more does not necessarily mean getting more done. It’s all about efficiency. Human beings require certain things in order to live tranquilly. Divvy up your time for all the things that you MUST do and then divvy the rest for the things that you WANT to do. Just make sure to be clear on what you need before you start going after what you want.

17. Stop Trying To Impress Others.

It’s not worth it. The only reason you should ever try to get on someone’s good side is if you need them for something — only in business. When it comes to more personal relationships you can’t do anything more than be yourself. If they don’t love you for who you are, then they will never truly love you.

18. Stop Wishing You Were Someone Else.

Make sure that you know who you are and do all you can to develop — not change. People don’t change, they develop and grow. You are a great individual because you are a human being. You have the potential to do anything you want. Figure out what it is that you want out of life and go after it. There is no need to change who you are to match some preexistent notion of who you should be. Of course, certain situations you may find yourself in will have certain rules of etiquette, which you will need to learn and adopt. However, who you know you are and who others perceive you to be does not have to be the same person.

19. Stop Overlooking The Simple Things In Life.

The simplest of things are the most beautiful of things. Take walks. Talk to strangers. Look up at the sky, the trees, the birds. Connect with nature and all that which comes at little to no price. We often do our best to reach for things that we believe will make us more in tune with reality — happier — only to find out that we were greatly mistaken. Life offers us simple beauties. Relish in them.

20. Stop Hating Yourself.

We are often too tough on ourselves. We hate ourselves for our failures and our inabilities — which makes no sense whatsoever. Failing is learning and inabilities can be turned into abilities with enough work and patience. Whatever you dislike about yourself can be changed… just be sure that it’s worth changing. My advice: learn to love yourself the way that you are. Changes are easier to make when you already have a good relationship with yourself.

Tuesday 4 February 2014

All the religions have been teaching you to fight against nature

Religions say that you have to manage to do something unnatural

All the religions have been teaching you to fight against nature. Whatsoever is natural, is condemned. Religions say that you have to manage to do something unnatural, only then can you get out of the imprisonment of biology, physiology, psychology, and all the walls that surround you. But if you go on in harmony with your body, with your mind, with your heart, then the religions say you will never be able to go beyond you. That’s where I oppose all the religions. They have put a poisonous seed in your being, so you live in your body, but you don’t love your body.

The body serves you for 70, 80, 90, even 100 years, and there is no other mechanism that science has been able to invent which can be compared to the body. Its complexities, its miracles that it goes on doing for you. and you don’t even say thank you. You treat your body as your enemy, although your body is your friend. 

Perhaps every cell of your body has a small brain in it.

It takes care of you in every possible way, while you are awake, while you are asleep. Even in sleep it goes on taking care of you. When you are asleep and a spider starts moving on your leg, your leg throws it away without bothering you. The leg has a small brain of its own. So for small matters there is no need to go to the central system, to go to the brain—that much the leg can do. A mosquito is biting you, your hands move it or kill it, and your sleep is not disturbed. The hand is not supposed to have a brain, but certainly it has something which can only be called a very small brain. Even while you are asleep your body is continuously protecting you, and doing things which it is not generally supposed to. Perhaps every cell of your body has a small brain in it. And there are millions of cells in your body, millions of small brains, moving around, continuously taking care of you. 

The body has certain wisdom of its own.
 
You go on eating all kinds of things without bothering what happens when you swallow them. You don’t ask the body whether its mechanism, its chemistry, will be able to digest what you are eating. But somehow your inner chemistry goes on working for almost a century. It has an automatic system of replacing parts which have gone wrong. It goes on throwing them out, creating new parts; and you have to do nothing about it, goes on happening on its own. The body has certain wisdom of its own.

And the religions say that the body is your enemy, you have to starve it, you have to hit it hard, because unless you starve it, torture it, how are you going to be free of it? They say the only way to be free of it is to cut all attachments to it. They teach you hatred for your body, and this is something so dangerous. The very idea turns your greatest friend into your greatest enemy. 

Body simply serves you without any payment from your side, no salary, no facilities, and religions says go against it
These religions go on saying to you, “You have to be always fighting, you have to move against the current. Don’t listen to the body—whatever it says, do just the opposite. The body is hungry, let it be hungry. You starve it, it needs that treatment.” It simply serves you without any payment from your side, no salary, no facilities, and religions says go against it. When it wants to fall asleep, try to remain awake.
It is not your foe, it is your friend. It is a gift of nature to you. It is part of nature. It is joined with nature in every possible way. You are bridged not only with breathing; with sun rays you are bridged, with the fragrance of flowers you are bridged, with the moonlight you are bridged. You are bridged from everywhere; you are not a separate island. Drop that idea. You are part of this whole continent, and yet… it has given you an individuality. This is what I call a miracle. You are part and parcel of existence, yet you have an individuality. Existence has done a miracle, has made possible something impossible.

Tuesday 21 January 2014

Death completes life

What is death?

The second thing to remember is: once you know what life is, you will know what death is. Death is also part of the same process. Ordinarily, we think death comes at the end; ordinarily we think death is against life; ordinarily we think death is the enemy. But death is not the enemy. And if you think of death as the enemy, it simply shows that you have not been able to know what life is.
Death and life are two polarities of the same energy, of the same phenomenon—the tide and the ebb, the day and the night, the summer and the winter. They are not separate and not opposites, not contraries; they are complementarity. Death is not the end of life; in fact, it is a completion of one life, the crescendo of one life, the climax, the finale. And once you know your life and its process, then you understand what death is.

Breathe in, breathe out

Death is an organic, integral part of life, and it is very friendly to life. Without it, life cannot exist. Life exists because of death; death gives the background. Death is, in fact, a process of renewal. And death happens each moment. The moment you breathe in and the moment you breathe out, both happen.

Breathing in, life happens; breathing out, death happens. That’s why when a child is born the first thing he does is breathe in, then life starts. And when an old man is dying, the last thing he does is breathe out, then life departs. Breathing out is death, breathing in is life—they are like two wheels of a bullock cart. You live by breathing in as much as you live by breathing out. The breathing out is part of breathing in. You cannot breathe in if you stop breathing out. You cannot live if you stop dying.

The man, who has understood what his life is, allows death to happen; he welcomes it. He dies each moment and each moment he is resurrected. His cross and his resurrection are continually happening as a process. He dies to the past each moment and he is born again and again into the future.

Ego and death are opposites

If you really want to live you have to be ready to die. Who is afraid of death in you? Is life afraid of death? It is not possible. How can life be afraid of its own integral process? Something else is afraid in you. The ego is afraid in you. Life and death are not opposites; ego and death are opposites. Life and death are not opposites; ego and life are opposites. Ego is against both life and death. The ego is afraid to live and the ego is afraid to die. It is afraid to live because each effort, each step towards life, brings death closer. If you live, you are coming closer to dying. The ego is afraid to die, hence it is afraid to live also. The ego simply drags.

Death Completes Life

Let it be remembered that death and life both become aflame together, they are never separate. If you are very, very minimally alive, at the minimum, then you can see death and life as being separate. The closer you come to the peak, the closer they start coming. At the very apex, they meet and become one. In love, in meditation, in trust, in prayer, wherever life becomes total, death is there. Without death, life cannot become total.